On Prayer

Kaycee making stained glass crafts - from Ride in Paradise

I’ve been learning a new way to pray recently.

I breathe, clear my mind…

Then I write the prayer.

If I have a lot on my mind, I will write a lot. It was very strange to me to write a prayer down and then later actually pray it. But I found myself much more focused and connected to God.

But when I am not writing the prayer, but the answer to the prayer, in God’s words, not mine, I am surprised.

The first time I did this I found the exercise to be a complete failure. “Who am I to write God’s word?” I’m no prophet.

But that night I read it back and felt very close to God, like the words really did come from Him. So maybe I can receive His word—not for the world, but at least for me.

The next night I did this (admittedly, this was several nights later, because I was nervous to try again…) I found that I had nothing coming to my mind. But I wrote the first words that came, one word at a time.

It was just as significant to me. I felt the question inside me, “shouldn’t I just keep doing this every day.”

The words to hymns I’ve sung my whole life are taking on new meaning:

“I need Thee every hour…”

“Where can I turn for peace?”

I am learning that if I can just let go of my idea of God as a piece of homework, and allow Him to actually talk to me, I feel completely different.

Prayer is actually a gift, from God to me, and not the other way around. Who knew?